This week, a coworker told me that she wished that she could eat Thanksgiving dinner at my house. She said that she knew that I would cook a great meal because I was raised in the country. My coworker went on to ask me if I was going to cook some chitterlings. After the comment, she started laughing. I immediately realized that she had committed a microagression against me. I was embarrased and I felt that I was being demeaned because of my background. I did not reply to the microagression; however, I wish I had made my views known.
I have learned that people make microaggressions intentionally and unintentionally. I know that my coworker was only joking around; however, my feelings were hurt in the process. I realize that microaggressions can hurt and they can be insults or assualts. This has helped me to be more conscious of how I speak with families and how I work with others.
Hi Tammy,
ReplyDeleteYour coworker's laughter seems to indicate that she knew she was saying an insulting remark. I wonder how your feelings might have changed, if at all, if she hadn't laughed? Did the laughter bring the insult to your attention, or simply make an already noticeable insult all the more insulting?
Tammy,
ReplyDeleteI learned that microaggressions can be unintentional but your co-worker was more than conscious about the hurting of her comment. After reading all our posts about microaggressions I can just think on how insulted, belittled, and/or ignored children may feel when we, as their teachers or other personal working with them commit a microaggression against them (which I hope are unintentionally done).
Thanks for sharing such personal experience!
I have found that there are microaggressions everywhere now that I know what they are and how they hurt people. I do not think that people are trying to be hurtful, society has made these types of microaggressions acceptable. I hope that one day we will all think before we speak and not make assumptions according to a persons cutlures, race or ethnicity.
ReplyDeleteTammy,
ReplyDeleteIntentional or unintentional microaggressions are psychologically damaging, create stress, and cause feelings of alienation.
Thanks for sharing your experience and thoughts.
Crystal
Tammy,
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like your co-workers realized she made a rude comment through laughter. I think a lot of people do this. They a comment and then realize it may have been inappropriate, laugh and say "just joking" or something similar. Thanks for sharing. I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving!